What Led You To Her? Decisions Made In Childhood?

    Our emotional histories depend on little decisions which, however small, are irreversible.  ___ One of the questions people often ask a married man is, “How did you meet your wife?” The question is loaded, of course, and an answer like, “Well, I was hanging out at this party in Linz and ran into a girl in a kitchen,” won’t suffice. Emotional histories fascinate us; the question is asking for a rich narrative. It’s a disguise for this: “What led you to fall for her?” ♦◊♦ I Read more [...]

Assessing Emotional Maturity By, Justin Nutt, LMSW

    “Maturity of mind is the capacity to endure uncertainty.” - John Finley All too often emotional maturity is viewed as a given attribute that a person achieves based on their chronological age. But the truth is that young or old, 6 or 60, isn’t what defines the emotional maturity of a person. The maturity of a person isn’t something that magically is bestowed upon a person when they enter puberty, graduate high school, or turn 21, it is something that comes from within and Read more [...]

Five Important Things Women Don’t Know About Men

  By Noah Brand editor-in-chief of the Good Men Project It’s true, men are complicated and confusing. Noah Brand clears up five common misconceptions. The title is, to be fair, an overgeneralization. These things are not universally true of all men, and there definitely are women out there who know and understand some or all of them. By and large, though, these are five areas where communication between the two most popular genders tends to break down on grounds of incomprehension. Women, Read more [...]

Are You a Soft Target for Manipulators? Take the test.

      Are You a Soft Target for Manipulators? Take the test to see and if you are, learn what you need to work on so you will no longer be a soft target for a manipulator. Read each statement below. If the statement is true or mostly True for you, circle T; if it is false or mostly false, circle F. Be Sure to circle either T or F for every item. No fence-sitting. Who’s Pulling Your Strings? T F   1. I should always try to please other people and make them happy. T F Read more [...]

Top Eight Ex- Etiquette Rules

Divorces are nasty, tangled affairs, and while being civil to your ex is sometimes a task as daunting as taking the one ring to Mordor (J. R. R. Tolkien's fictional universe of Middle-earth), it’s not impossible. Divorce and early post-divorce is a time when emotions are running high, decorum is soon forgotten, and everyone gets in on the mess, from in-laws to friends and family. Everyone gets a piece of the divorce drama pie, and somehow, amidst all this, you have to try and keep civil to your Read more [...]

Divorce Coping Tip of the Day – Learn from Long Distance Relationships

    Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net Why are people so quick to criticize long distance relationships? Yes, you are far away from the person you love, but let’s look at some of the positive points that can be made. When you do have time together, it is cherished. During your communications, people really listen to each other and understand their partners true feeling on issues. Long distance relationships seem to fight less, and focus more on loving each other Read more [...]

Does Technology and Modern Society put Relationships on a Path for Destruction?

    Technology has many benefits but personally I feel it is making relationships harder. Here are some of the things I have noticed: conversations have become texting; arguments became phone calls, and feelings became subliminal messages online for the whole world to see.   Our modern society contributes also to the difficulty relationships suffer today. Sex became easy and with anyone. The word love gets used all the time for things that are really not loved. Insecurities have Read more [...]

What is love?

      What is love? To answer this enormous question I think it's important to, first of all, look at what love is NOT. All too often jealousy, mistrust, expectation, desperation and loneliness are mistaken for love. A person becomes fixated on another because they're not happy with themselves or are dissatisfied with their life. They attract a partner similar to themselves who is seeking to fill the void in their own life; someone to take on the mammoth task of making them Read more [...]

A Perfect Age for Marriage?

Article By Gint  Aras "Originally appeared at The Good Men Project".  February  4, 2013 Let’s start advising people to marry if they  feel they’ve met the right person, not because they’ve come up against their  30th birthday.   I read with great interest this piece in the Atlantic by Pheoby Maltz Bovy: There’s No Perfect Age to Find a  Husband. The article’s point is essentially stated in the title. Of  course, I concur, as I’ve written on similar topics before. While Read more [...]

Do You Love More?

  When in a relationship are there times when it seems you put so much more than your partner does? Here are a couple reasons why you could attract a partner where you love more than they love you. If either of these examples applies to you, there is a high likelihood you will end up with a partner just like your ex. Did one or both of your parents not give you love and attention you needed as a child? You may believe that people just don’t love as deeply as you do. Because of this, you Read more [...]