Ex Insults Your Sexual Performance

  If your ex lashed out with insults about your sexual performance or pleasing ability, throw that thought out with your next bag of trash. It is likely to be as off kilter as the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Insults that cut below the belt have a clever way of niggling away at your very core, but their vitriol is likely to have been fuelled by the stuff that powers them; bilious spite. The truth is, if your existence has descended to this level of horror, there is only one way it can go, back Read more [...]

What to Do during the Holiday Season

"Research data show that loneliness is a killer. Even bigger than cigarettes. If the thought of holidays without your ex evokes emptiness and sadness for you, know that you don't have to stay in that state and suffer. Our emotional state is largely influenced by our perception and actions. You don't have to be helpless. Think about some of the practical advice below. The following remarks written by Tasher will help you put things into perspective." Latica Mirjanic, MA Psych, Upper deck self Read more [...]

They are Divorcing YOU?

    You left your spouse for a list of unpleasant behaviors and then before you had the time to draw breath, you found a letter on the doormat from a solicitor saying they are divorcing you. Well, if you can step away from the anguish of the inequity that is undoubtedly woven into the situation, you’ll do yourself a favor. Anybody that files for divorce has to write a godforsaken paragraph of reasons why this is the case and your ex may well have taken lyrical liberties with the freedom Read more [...]

Concentrate on Actual Things in YOUR Life

It’s easy to occupy your mind with worry about possible rumors you think your ex may be spreading about you, as they flail around like a lost salmon looking for new ways to rack you off. The physical and emotional energy required to fight those invisible ghosts, is probably more than you can spare right now. Concentrate on actual things in YOUR life, worry not about potentials and keep holding onto the fact that the madness will not last forever.   You will heal and when you do the things Read more [...]

Start a Group for Like-Minded Souls?

  For some, walking a solitary path to healing from a divorce, is the way forward. For others, sharing their experience and empathizing with others who are at sea in the same boat, is the way to go. If you feel you belong in the boat, it might be worth seeking out divorce recovery groups or workshops near you; there are lots and they seem to be quite a growing trend. A quick search on the Internet will bring up Divorce Care (US) and Divorce Recovery Workshop (UK) - there are undoubtedly Read more [...]

Significant Dates Change Color

    After a divorce, previously significant dates change color and feel a little strange, mostly because you’re not sure how you are supposed to feel about them. That date stays on the calendar and comes around every year! The birthday of your ex is a good example. What do you do? Send a card, don’t send a card; to be honest, that’s an easy one to deal with by comparison to your wedding anniversary. Whether you spent a year together or three decades or more, that date signifies the Read more [...]

It is Wise to Contact Your Insurance Company ASAP

  Car insurance is one of those strange anomalies that’s only likely to rear its renewable head once a year. If you are recently separated and were jointly insured for your vehicles, you’ll be wise to contact your insurance company or broker to make any necessary adjustments to the policies, as soon as possible. This is most especially relevant if your ex usually handled those affairs. You really don’t want to find out that they’ve removed you from a policy you thought was in place, Read more [...]

Distractions can be Incredibly Welcome

      The distractions that come with a gentle responsibility can be incredibly welcome when all your mind can focus on is the dreaded divorce. Have a look around your immediate vicinity to see if there’s anything you can get involved in that is gentle on your mind. Consider doing a minimal amount of volunteering in a charitable organization, or think about joining a reading group perhaps. These  distractions should be something that fits into a regular slot but isn’t Read more [...]

The Urge to Tell Your Ex Precisely What You Think of Them

  It can be incredibly difficult to resist the urge to tell your ex precisely what you think of them, particularly when they are behaving like a complete and utter tit. However, opening a line of futile dialogue is precisely that, futile and it may lead to a vat full of stress that you probably don’t need. How’s this for a cover solution; face paint, a nice thin brush and a private canvas, ie your forearm, tummy, thighs or elsewhere, could replace the spoken word and you can write whatever Read more [...]

Apply a Liberal Sprinkling of Patience

  Whether you’re 5 minutes past separation from your old spouse, knee-deep in divorce or 5 years the other side of your Decree Absolute, when it comes to dealing with an vexing ex, you’ll do well to apply a liberal sprinkling of patience.   Trouble is that’s far easier said than done.   There are limited things that enable aggravated patience levels to decrease; a dogged determination to rise above their pathetic behavior so they don’t bother you anymore and the simple Read more [...]