Abuse is a four letter word in many relationships and is becoming too common in our twisted view on relationships. How do you move on from this point when you have already been the victim of an abusive relationship? In this section you can learn all about healing from abuse, the process, and other great information. There is a way to recover from an abusive relationship and meet someone else and actually have a normal relationship. We can help you to realize this.
I posted my Talk given to the Better than Ever After Divorce Community before, but learned the link did not work. As such I got a copy of the mp3 from the organization that hosted the talk and I up loaded directly to the site and undated the post.
This is a recording of a talk I was asked to give to an international audience for Better than Ever After Divorce. Dee Adio-Moses asked me to talk on the topic after interviewing me about my book on her radio show. Some of the topics Read more [...]
Abusive relationships leave our self-esteem debilitated. People who have experienced abuse in their previous relationships have become paralyzed with fear-- fear of not being able to love again, fear of not being loved again and that fear of experiencing failure in their future relationships.
You may currently be healing from abuse, and you think that it may still be too early to enter into a new relationship, and you are right. However, there is nothing too early about learning and understanding Read more [...]
Projection in relationships is one of the most common reasons of abusive relationships. This is a defense mechanism of most people that they are not aware of. Projection is what other people do in order to manage and cope with their feelings.
Psychological projection is about projecting your undesirable feelings to someone else instead of dealing with it yourself. When this is done in a relationship, it becomes an abusive one.
When Projection becomes Abusive
This abusive behavior Read more [...]
Turns every conversation to him/her expects you to meet his/her emotional needs
Ignores the impact of his/her negative comments on you
Constantly criticizes or berates you and knows what is best for you
Focus on blaming rather than taking responsibility for their own behavior
Expect you to jump at their every need
Is overly involved with their own hobbies, interests or addictions ignoring your needs
Has high need for attention:
Brags, sulks, complains, Read more [...]
It is important to point out that labeling my ex's behavior as the result of a disorder awards him too much sympathy and leniency. He, and all other narcissists (N's) or Borderlines (BPD's) and sociopaths, know exactly what they are doing. While their inclinations are driven by a tragic psychological disorder, their actions are chosen. They choose to abuse! Plain and simple. If you're not sure about this and want to believe that their behavior is beyond their control, ask yourself Read more [...]
Character Traits of a Narcissist
1. Self-centered. Their needs are paramount.
2. No remorse for mistakes or misdeeds.
3. Unreliable, undependable.
4. Does not care about the consequences of their actions.
5. Projects his/her faults on to others. High
blaming behavior; never his/her fault.
6. Little if any conscience.
7. Insensitive to needs and feelings of others.
8. Has a good front (persona) to impress and exploit others.
9. Low stress tolerance. Easy to anger Read more [...]
When you are young everything revolves around relationships...your relationship with your family, your relationships with your friends and peers, and your romantic relationships. As we age and grow into who we are as people it is natural for the focus to be less on relationships with others and more on the relationship we have with ourselves; however, even as adults that often isn't the case.
In our society we put a lot of emphasis on romantic love. We watch romantic comedies, Read more [...]
Stories of Survivors:
Stories of those who have overcome abuse
As many of you know I am a private practice clinician an author, and a tv show host...what you may not know is that my greatest passion is connected to a fight against domestic violence and serve as the Executive Director of a domestic violence organization, Acts of Random Kindness (or ARK.)
ARK is in the process of collecting stories of survivors of domestic violence in various stages of rebuilding their lives and recovering Read more [...]
If you're feeling hopeless, HOPE is just a phone call away. No matter what problems you are struggling with, hurting yourself isn't the answer.
1-800-273-TALK (8255) For Hearing & Speech Impaired with TTY Equipment: 1-800-799-4TTY (4889)
If you are in a relationship that is violent, and remember violence is not just physical but also mental and emotional, then seek help when you are able. The Hotline is a national domestic violence help line. Their number is 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).