Abbreviations used by MEV

    Here is a list of the abbreviations used by MEV. "Narcissist" can be cumbersome to type over and over again, so feel free to use these abreviations: N/NPDer - Narcissist P - Psychopath NP - Narcissistic Psychopath NPD - Narcissistic Personality Disorder PA - Passive Aggressive NS - Narcissistic Supply APD - Antisocial Personality Disorder BPD - Borderline Personality Disorder Bi-P - Bi-Polar NC - No Contact NW - Narcissist Wife NH - Narcissist Husband XN - Ex Narcissist XNW/WNH Read more [...]

Release Yourselves from the Blame and Guilt

        We go over it over and over again, finding all kinds of problems with ourselves.  “I wasn’t good enough,” “I did everything wrong and did not please them enough,”  “I should have loved them more,”  “The other person was better at loving them than me,” ..... but the fact remains that the relationship fell apart.  So we need to release ourselves from the blame and guilt.  Do this for yourself your ex did what they did for themselves.     Would Read more [...]

Cheating & It’s Impact

  Infidelity is one of the worst things that you can ever do to your partner – so why do so many actually commit such a crime? In our previous article we spoke about what infidelity actually is. Today, we want to concentrate on what the biggest reasons are for each gender. What are the most common excuses given for cheating? Also, what kind of impact can it have on a divorce proceeding and beyond? If you have previously been involved in cheating in the past, whether you were the one cheating Read more [...]

Encouraging Thoughts to Help Improve Your Self-Esteem

    Encouraging Thoughts to Help Improve Your Self-Esteem  Thoughts that inspire exploration and reflection (again, compliments to my beautiful therapist) Happiness can be defined in many ways, but what IS it that gives us this wonderful sensation that emanates from deep within ourselves? The answer comes from deep within. Self Esteem or Self Respect is not given to use through praise, gifts or attention. It’s about ourselves learning how to do things for ourselves, how to be responsible Read more [...]

Talk given to the Better than Ever After Divorce Community

  I posted my Talk given to the Better than Ever After Divorce Community before, but learned the link did not work.  As such I got a copy of the mp3 from the organization that hosted the talk and I up loaded directly to the site and undated the post. This is a recording of a talk I was asked to give to an international audience for Better than Ever After Divorce.  Dee Adio-Moses asked me to talk on the topic after interviewing me about my book on her radio show.  Some of the topics Read more [...]

A Success Story: – Infidelity – I Didn’t Let His Affair Destroy Me

“There are all kinds of ways for a relationship to be tested, even broken, some, irrevocably; it’s the endings we’re unprepared for.” ― Katherine Owen, Not To Us About two years ago, I thought my life was falling apart. After the death of one of my parents, I found out my husband was having an affair and he walked out on my son and me at the weakest moment in my life. I sat in my house with my son who was a toddler, and didn’t understand what I did to deserve to lose my father and the Read more [...]

What Counts as Cheating?

        Cheating is difficult to define.  In a really broad sense, cheating includes betraying a partner's expectations about the type of contact allowed with others. When a partner, breaks one's expectations about exactly what is appropriate, individuals feel betrayed. Relationships are not based on logic; however, they are influenced by our feelings. Cheating is complex because the meaning varies so extremely. However, when someone violates a partner's expectations, the Read more [...]

Etiquette in Divorce for The Cheater

As the aggressor in a divorce, the cheater should really have no right to be getting in there and using underhand tactics. As somebody who broke the rules in their marriage, resorting to less than friendly tactics and petty, vindictive moves is not going to help anything move on. Remember – you broke your ex’s heart. You cannot possibly expect them to be alright about this, can you? They will be hurt and smarting, and some ex’s in this situation will react in an immature manner. Rather than Read more [...]

Patterns

  My separation happened about a year and a couple months ago. I can no longer remember the exact date that my wife told me she couldn't stay married to me any longer. It was a hell of a day with a long and argument filled build up. Followed by a long and argument filled time-frame while I was looking for a new place to live. Without going too much into it I can tell you that our situation was fairly typical in many ways. We weren’t satisfied, she started going out more and more. She Read more [...]