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I frequently ask people to give me their views on what information should be shared on the website. I received this in an email today. It is very straight forward and to the point. – Tasher
A man’s view regarding where you should try to meet people of the opposite sex.
First off, let’s get something out of the way immediately. We’re guys, if you have a pulse, no ring and a vagina; hell even with a ring for some, you’re available. However, the chance of finding the love of your life in a bar is not only remote, but damn near impossible. Now I’m not going to say it doesn’t happen, but don’t wager the family dog on it. He’s not there to find his soul mate, he’s there to find someone to give cab fare to and never see again in the morning. What we are looking for is a smart, well rounded, pretty woman that has a common interest.
Now if you find a hot guy that you want to have dirty things done to you by, he gets it. He’s had women hit on him with offers of dirty things since he was 16. Chances are he’s a tool of the highest order. If you placate him and hang on his every word he knows. If his main interest is underwater basket weaving and you find that fascinating, he knows. There’s an old saying….”If a woman falls over backwards with her ankles behind her ears, it’s a nice night, but not a woman you want to have children with”.
The best places in my opinion are where you never expect it. Do you read books? Go to Barns and Noble. Have a dog? Go to a dog park. Do you like the arts, go to the theater. Pick something that interests YOU, NOT HIM. If you meet at a place of mutual interest then you immediately have a common interest. Let me give an example. I race and sail sailboats. I dated a girl that was scared to death of the water because of a near death drowning incident in her childhood which I never knew. She went sailing with me but I always had the sense that she was not happy. After a YEAR I asked her what was the deal. She told me the story and said she just couldn’t go out sailing anymore. We lasted another 3 months because I didn’t stop racing and she resented the fact that I was gone on the weekends. Now I didn’t change my life in one bit as she knew what she was getting into from the onset. So it wasn’t my fault, it was hers. She should have looked for a guy that didn’t have my hobby, found someone with a common interest and lived happily ever after. Was I supposed to toss my hobby that I have done since I was 6 years old, sold a 20,000.00 sailboat to make her happy? Of course not, and you want to know why, I would have been miserable. So she would have been placated for a time but I would have been miserable which means the end is near. Now that might have been over simplified but I’m not only a guy, but a man, so don’t look for poetry.
If you let a man dictate your future you become a pawn, do to be dominated and in the end, discarded. What is your interest? Exploit those and find a guy who shares those same interests. I’m sure you all have seen Runaway Bride with Julia Roberts and Richard Gere. Perfect example. She liked the eggs that her current guy liked and she took up HIS hobbies. So she conformed herself into his perfect spouse yet she was miserable because it had no bearing on who SHE was as a person. If you become someone you’re not, you have neither anyone to blame but yourself, nor any expectations that he will change his life to make you happy. If he does in fact change his life to make you happy, I predict doom and unmitigated failure, and that goes both ways by the way. Period.
Would you like to support DASNM? If so, it is easy, just use this link Amazon Purchases in support of DASNM.com A small percentage of the amount you order will be sent to DASNM. Thank you for your support. — Tasher