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Dealing with Dating Burn-Out

 

Have you ever thought to yourself “Are there any normal people out there to date?” That is the way I feel right now. At times, I think “all of these people are single for a reason.” Then I remember “I am one of those man sitting on log in forestpeople and I am normal.” I am not sure what the reason is, but I seem to attract some of the more “colorful people” to date. Most of the time I laugh it off, but after a while I get the dreaded dating burn out. We all know the symptoms, and it is no surprise when it happens. I understand one of the prevailing views is to keep dating when burn out hits. Personally I think if we keep pushing ourselves to date it will make it worse. Here are some strategies that I use to get over the burn out.

Now is the time to stop dating or looking for a partner. Dating should be fun it should not feel like a job. Take the time to re-charge your batteries. Once the pressure is off and you start living your life again, you will attract more people to be around you.

Find something that you have always wanted to do but did not have the time. Try to list at least three things you enjoy doing, and then throw yourself into those activities. Make sure at least two of these activities are not a solo activity. Maybe join a poker club like Texas Hold’ Em, love reading, join a book club; shooting a gun, join a shooting range and so on. Some of the bonuses can be meeting new people, keeping busy and losing yourself in the project and building your confidence.

Re-evaluate your feelings to make sure you are not the problem. Take time and reflect to see if all the baggage in your past fully been processes? Past wounds must be fully healed, or without knowing it, you may be making the same mistakes over and over. Are the date’s just carbon copies of your ex and many times the only difference is their name? Unless you take some time to figure out what you are feeling, your love life will seem to be stuck in repeat. Help is out there do not be too proud to receive it. I am proud to say I got help when I needed it.

Take your friend of the opposite sex out for dinner, movie or dancing making sure to laugh and have fun. It is helpful to share your feelings and get a hug from someone of the opposite sex. Your friends can fill the void, and there are no unrealistic expectations.

Take time for yourself and banish, the negativity, and start boosting your confidence. When the time is right, and your batteries have recharged, someone will ask you out, and you will want to go, or you will walk by the computer and decide to look online again.

 

 

 
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