Talk given to the Better than Ever After Divorce Community

  I posted my Talk given to the Better than Ever After Divorce Community before, but learned the link did not work.  As such I got a copy of the mp3 from the organization that hosted the talk and I up loaded directly to the site and undated the post. This is a recording of a talk I was asked to give to an international audience for Better than Ever After Divorce.  Dee Adio-Moses asked me to talk on the topic after interviewing me about my book on her radio show.  Some of the topics Read more [...]

What Counts as Cheating?

        Cheating is difficult to define.  In a really broad sense, cheating includes betraying a partner's expectations about the type of contact allowed with others. When a partner, breaks one's expectations about exactly what is appropriate, individuals feel betrayed. Relationships are not based on logic; however, they are influenced by our feelings. Cheating is complex because the meaning varies so extremely. However, when someone violates a partner's expectations, the Read more [...]

Projection: Your Partner is Not a Mirror

    Projection in relationships is one of the most common reasons of abusive relationships. This is a defense mechanism of most people that they are not aware of. Projection is what other people do in order to manage and cope with their feelings. Psychological projection is about projecting your undesirable feelings to someone else instead of dealing with it yourself. When this is done in a relationship, it becomes an abusive one. When Projection becomes Abusive This abusive behavior Read more [...]

Be The Expert of Your Own Life

I often get asked what my greatest passion is, not just in interviews or Q&A sessions after talks, but by friends as well.  That's always been a difficult question for me to answer, as I have so many different pursuits that I'm highly passionate about.  Friends know that I have a huge passion for writing books on the topics of relationships and dating, they know I have a passion for domestic violence work, a passion for giving talks on relationships, and a passion for countless other things.  Read more [...]

Assessing Emotional Maturity By, Justin Nutt, LMSW

    “Maturity of mind is the capacity to endure uncertainty.” - John Finley All too often emotional maturity is viewed as a given attribute that a person achieves based on their chronological age. But the truth is that young or old, 6 or 60, isn’t what defines the emotional maturity of a person. The maturity of a person isn’t something that magically is bestowed upon a person when they enter puberty, graduate high school, or turn 21, it is something that comes from within and Read more [...]

Snap Out of It!

Snap out of it!  This is not being said in a spirit of being mean or harsh or uncaring….  Sometimes we get so stuck in the story of our broken relationship…the unfairness of it…the pain…fear…regret…anger…betrayal…disappointment…All that ____________ (fill in the blank)  And, really…it’s not so unusual to get stuck in our stories…after all…they’re so REAL to us…This is what’s happening, right?  But…is it ALL that’s happening?  Is your life defined solely Read more [...]

INSTEAD OF WORRYING ABOUT FINDING SOMEONE NEW, FOCUS ON YOU!

When people find themselves single again, it can be a scary experience.  Often in the grips of change and loneliness, we find ourselves wondering about the “whens”, “wheres” and “hows” of finding someone new.  However, jumping right back into another relationship is not always beneficial to everyone involved, most importantly-yourself. Before getting involved in another relationship right away, we need to do what is best for us, which is to heal completely.  It is necessary to be Read more [...]

Exerscise Your Relationship and Exerscise!

  Hi everyone, Today we are going to talk about choosing exerscise, a healthy lifestyle and motivating your loved ones or those who you care about to join you without you pushing them away. We all know that you can motivate, be persistent, Inspire, etc... but you can't do it for them.  They have to want it in order to do it. This applies to everything, including, losing weight, positive attitude, being in peace with yourselves, getting into healthy relationships or making our existing relationships Read more [...]

Late Night Call May be Reaching Out for Help or Something Else

      There are few topics I’m reticent to dip into because of the enormity of them. This is one such and if this tip is relevant to you, please seek further advice and assistance, it is not something you need to deal with on your own. The divorce is over and you get a late night call from your ex saying, “I can’t live without you. You can’t do this to me, I’ll kill myself.” Where on earth do you go from here? Threatened self-harm or suicide is indeed a cry for Read more [...]

Dating after Divorce: Most Common Dating Mistakes by Women

Taking a plunge into the dating world again after a divorce, you may find yourself making the same dating mistakes over again. These are some of the most common dating mistakes committed by women. It is important to recognize and understand them so that you will avoid repeating the same in your next dates. 1.    Approaching Men First. Although most conventional dating advice encourages women to take the first step by flirting and striking a conversation, most of the women, who are struggling Read more [...]