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We have all heard someone say something to someone else that made us cringe as we heard it. Maybe it was a guy talking down to his girlfriend or a student bullying one of their peers in class. This is something so common during and after a divorce between not only you and your ex it may even include the ex-family also. While this can be hard to hear, it may not always be what it appears. When a person treats another human in a derogatory way, there can be multiple reasons for it that has nothing to do with the victim doing anything wrong. When you dive deeper into the cause of why someone is being mean, it is then that you really get down to what is bothering a person. Typically, the comment has nothing to do with you so move on, let it go, and do not give the negative comments any value.
When a person is confident in themselves and happy with their life, they are much less likely to aggravate others. Instead a person who is happy will work towards making other people happy as well. They will encourage others and lift people up when they are down. They are a pleasure to be around as they are nice and loving. The person giving the derogatory comments is often experiencing these same words by another person. In turn, they are using that same behavior towards other people because that is how they learned to handle situations. This person may need counseling to get better and quit hurting others.
There may be times when a comment can hit close to home. Take a step back and think about the meaning of this negative comment. Was it something that could have some truth in it? If you find that the comment is something that needs attention, then make a change in yourself so that you never have to worry about it again. More times than not, the comment is not accurate. If it was, they would not have said it in such a negative way. If a person is trying to help you, they will do it in an uplifting manner. When a person points the finger at you, you can be sure it is them covering up something to do with them.
To better understand the meaning of a comment, you want to take the words and rearrange them to understand the meaning better. When a person says, you were not good enough for me, they are often saying, I was not good enough for you. Not everyone can express their feelings in the right way, and they often displace their anger onto someone else. Rather than take the comment to heart, you should instead try and figure out what they are really saying. It can be easy to fight the comment by saying something mean back to the person. Instead, be the bigger person by not saying anything back.
At times, the person who is being mean is just hiding something or looking for attention. This other person is obviously not happy and is looking to make others feel the same way. Give the negative comments no value and remember what others think or say about you is none of your business.
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Originally posted 2013-11-03 11:49:40. Republished by Blog Post Promoter